This Starfish Went Viral For All The Wrong Reasons (You Perverts)

At the end of last month, a starfish at the aquarium went mega-viral. That's not something they generally do, so you're probably wondering why. Is it a new species, perhaps, or maybe it's learned some basic math?

I'm afraid not. This starfish went viral because it is, to use Internet parlance, mighty thicc. It is packing a fine trunk. It has, to be fair to it, an exceptional badonkadonk.

^{Stupid sexy starfish.}

People were especially complimentary of the starfish's ass, comparing it to the ripped buttocks of Patrick from SpongeBob SquarePants.

This little starfish isn't the only one with "cheeks" like this.

So what is going on here, as we all know starfish don't have buttocks you could bounce a penny off of. Well, a sea life expert has confirmed, as if you needed it, that the thing that everyone is ogling is not, in fact, an ass.

"Sea stars are actually invertebrates or animals without backbones and not fish despite people commonly referring to them as 'starfish,'" Nate Jaros, curator of fish and invertebrates at the Aquarium of the Pacific, explained to USA Today.

"In this photo, the sea star is on a vertical rock face with two of its arms holding the rock and two arms hanging in a relaxed position. Sea stars sometimes relax their arms such as when they are eating.

"Since the sea star is oriented vertically, gravity is causing its internal components to slump."

So, in essence, you have been drooling over not the ass of a starfish, but the arms, and I'm going to spend the next month trying to decide whether that makes you more or less of a pervert, to be honest with you.

The original tweeter responded in a follow-up tweet to people's questions, explaining in the exasperated fashion typical of someone who has just done a viral tweet, "starfish don’t have ass cheeks, it’s a middle school level joke but I’m sorry that I’m 'sexualizing starfish.' My sister was like 'omg look' and I thought 'haha looks like it has a butt'. I thought only like two people would see it."

Now cleanse your viral starfish palette with this article about a starfish taking a wholesome (but disturbing) "walk" across a beach.