Culture and Society
PUBLISHED
Tech-mediated sexual interactions are a common staple of modern romance in the information age, but are they a healthy way to build a relationship and satisfy those carnal urges? According to a recent study, it depends on how you do it.
How common is sexting?
Sexting, sending nudes, and other forms of smartphone-enabled intimacy are part of the standard sexual repertoire for many people in the 21st century.
A survey in 2015 found that 88 percent of US participants reported ever having sexted and 82 percent reported they had sexted within just the past year. Around 75 percent of people said they sexted their partner in a committed relationship, while 43 percent said they sexted with their flings and more casual sexual relationships.
These statistics are over 10 years old, but other research has suggested that sexting is on the rise, especially among teens.
To sext or not to sext
In the latest study, psychologists at Toronto Metropolitan University and the University of Ottawa surveyed hundreds of people about their relationships and their thoughts on “technology-mediated sexual interaction."
This includes an array of behaviors, from exchanging explicit messages and sharing intimate images to engaging in phone sex.
The researchers were especially keen to see whether the participants had positive motives, such as feeling closer to a partner, or negative motives, like avoiding an argument or a partner's disappointment.
Finally, the participants were scored on how often they participated in tech-mediated sexual interactions on a 9-point frequency scale (1 = Never in my life, 9 = More than once a day in the past 12 months).
The results showed motivation was key
Through two surveys, the team found that people who engaged in sexting with a positive motivation tended to have higher relationship and sexual satisfaction with their partner. Vice versa, those who sexted with negative motivation had less desire for their partner.
Unsurprisingly, sexting to build intimacy or share pleasure tends to go along with better outcomes, while doing it out of guilt, pressure, or fear can lead to more negative outcomes.
In other words, “It’s Not What You Do, It’s Why,” as the title of the paper reads.
“This might suggest that someone who sexts, for example, to prevent a break-up often does get the outcome they were trying to avoid, which reinforces both the behavior and the motive, even while the broader satisfaction picture is worse,” Erin Leigh Courtice, lead study author and a postdoctoral research associate working with the CARE Lab at Toronto Metropolitan University, told PsyPost.
In terms of frequency, people with strong positive motives and strong negative motives both tended to sext their partners the most – the number of nudes you exchange doesn't necessarily imply you have a healthy relationship or a dysfunctional relationship.
As a slight caveat, the study did note their sample was slightly skewed towards young, heterosexual women who went to university in the US, so it might not be representative of the whole population and every culture.
As ever with these kinds of studies, results at the population level might not apply in the same way to an individual.
Self-love and body image
The paper touched on whether some people participate in sexting for self-affirmation and receiving reassurance about their desirability, which they perceive as a “distinct sexual motive”.
In their conclusion, the authors say the factor of affirmation should be more closely investigated, noting that body image and self-esteem could potentially influence how many people experience sexting and other tech-mediated sex.
The new study is published in The Journal of Sex Research.
