Strange Legal Loophole Might Allow You To Be Cryogenically Frozen While Alive

So far, this only really works on ice cream. Umpol Chinhangor/Shutterstock

At present, you cannot cryogenically freeze someone and bring them back to life. The technology doesn’t yet exist, and if you tried, you’d be trialed for murder. Do not do this.

Weirdly, human cryogenics is legal in certain countries, but you have to be dead to be frozen. For most of you reading this hoping for a shot at resurrection, this will come as bad news. However, as pointed out by The Telegraph, there’s a legal loophole that can get you around this: namely, go to a country where euthanasia is legal.

We know, this all sounds incredibly grim, but it’s not stopping Russian cryonics company KrioRus from trying. It is hoping to fund a bunker in Switzerland, that people who are terminally ill, say, can head into, get themselves turned into a human popsicle, and hope that one day, in the future, technology will reanimate them.

Thanks to the legalization of euthanasia in Switzerland a while back, the company will not be committing a murder or assisted suicide against the law. It’s all legal – but right now, everything, from the bunker to the candidates to even the cryogenic technology, is entirely hypothetical. It’s just an idea, and one that is bound to (rightly or wrongly) cause a fuss should it ever become a reality.

KrioRus, for its part, has already had a bit of a practice run when it comes to freezing.

According to its website, it is “the first company outside the USA that offers cryonics services, including cryoconservation and storage,” adding that “so far, over 50 human patients and 20 animals have been cryonized in Russia.

“These patients are preserved in liquid nitrogen in anticipation of the future technology for their revival.”

It explains that the company was founded back in 2005 as part of the Russian Transhumanist Movement, a non-government group that aims to use technology to massively boost human intelligence and physical aptitude. Resurrection appears to be a rather lofty ideal at the far end of this technological journey.

Sure, in the future, it’s not unfeasible to suggest that cryopreservation could exist. Perhaps it’ll be a variant that doesn’t kill the person inside, but instead puts them in a state of suspension.

At present though, we’re a long, long way off from this. We’re complex and fragile biological machines, and temperature extremes tend to be a bit lethal right now. The ice crystals forming in your cells will ultimately end up destroying them, and, eventually, you.

Although seemingly ambitious and decidedly high-tech, all KrioRus can offer you right now is a chance to be frozen to death as an icicle – that, and a lot of crossed fingers.

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