Trump Tells Gettysburg Crowd How He'll Destroy The Planet To "Protect American Workers"

What has the environment ever done for us? Joseph Sohm/Shutterstock

Clean coal is a highly contentious phrase that refers to the idea that pollution scrubbers could remove a lot of the carbon dioxide emissions from coal-fired power plants before it escapes into the atmosphere. At present, these scrubbers are only being trialed, their use is far from widespread, and they are proving to be incredibly ineffective.

For all intents and purposes, clean coal isn’t real, even if there is a page outlining what it could be idling around on a US government website. After all, the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) have a page about mermaids, but you don’t hear the fishing industry complain about these pesky half-human fish creatures stealing their catches.

It’s also worth pointing out that tens of thousands of people in the US die from air pollution generated by the use of fossils fuels every single year. There’s no point creating jobs if there’s no one left breathing to fill them.


Finally, Trump confirmed that he will reapprove the Keystone Pipeline, a nixed project designed to siphon oil from Canada to the US. Obama cancelled it after an exhaustive seven-year-long review, citing climate change as the deciding factor. Famously seeing climate change as a Chinese hoax, it’s no surprise that Trump wishes to resurrect it.

In this garbled mess of an announcement, Trump has quietly slipped in details about how he would “save” the national economy by screwing over the planet. America is inconveniently attached to the planet, so we doubt this plan will actually work.

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