If you already have a partner, congratulations, you've beaten the system.
For the rest of us, modern dating is a minefield. There are so many rules and games to play it's easy to lose track. You might be "left on read" by someone you really liked, and your mind may spin out of control when you're over-analysing what their last few messages really meant.
The woes don't necessarily stop when you find someone. With Tinder right at your fingertips, it's tempting to go back and see if there is someone out there who is just a bit more perfect. With so much available choice, how are you supposed to know if someone is right for you? When should you stop over-thinking and finally commit?
Business Insider asked nine relationship experts for the signs to look out for when you're trying to figure out if someone is right for you.
Here's what they said:
- 1. They pass the 'bar test'
"As simple as this may seem, I call it the 'bar test' to know if you're with the right person. When you're at a bar (or restaurant, wherever) with your new partner, are you looking around to see who else is out there or who might see you two together? Or, are you perfectly content with your partner, and you want everyone there to notice you with him/her? If the latter is true, then he/she passes the test. But if it's the former, it might be time to decide whether being in a relationship with this person is your best option."
— Erika Ettin, dating coach and founder of dating site A Little Nudge
2. They don't hold you back
"A person who can authentically be excited about your success and goals in life is someone who won't feel the need to hold you back. Most unhealthy relationships include some form of sabotaging of one partner. Dating someone who is happy with their life means they can be happy for you and alongside of you."
— Shannon Thomas, therapist and author of "Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse"
3. They don't want to change you
"When you listen to your heart, you'll feel whether or not the person you're dating is right for you. This is known as 'intuition' — your heart's message to you. Almost everyone can think back and recall a time when they didn't listen to it. When you feel good, feel that your partner is patient and true, treats you the same in public as he/she does at home, then you're on the right path. Keep in mind that your intuition may send out warnings as well. It may come as a gut reaction. For example, if your partner wants to change you in any way. He/she is not accepting you for who you are. If that happens, run. That is a sign of a controlling person and he/she will never treat you properly."
— Tracy Malone, founder of Narcissist Abuse Support.